Blink of an eye

This morning, I called my boyfriend; he'd spent the night out with his best friend. He had too much to drink so he slept it off on his buddies couch. When I called, I could tell they were still having fun. I could hear him in the background, still talking, teasingly competing for Gavin's attention. I told him to have a good day, promised I'd call him back tonight and hung up. They were heading out on their motorcycles, which was their perfect way to spend the day, so I felt confident they would.When I called him back tonight, Gav was in tears. He and his friend had been challenged to a race. Gav declined; his bike is older and he hasn't had time to work on it much. His friend accepted the challenge, and died in an accident. Just like that.

So many emotions. Hurt, fear, anger. Part of me wants to slap him and ask him why? Why would you do something so foolish, so reckless? Part of me wants to just cling to Gav and hold him and take as much of the pain and grief off of him I can, share the burden. Part of me is relieved, even because it WASN'T Gav. And of course, I feel guilty about that feeling, too.

Life is so fleeting - sometimes it seems it will last forever. Then in the blink of an eye, it's gone.We'd all be better, I think, if we kept that in mind. We'd be slower to get angry or irritable with one another and quicker to say 'I love you'.